Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Randomize
