i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
