I need help removing her.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Randomize
