vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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