Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
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