farters have to be the big spoon...
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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