We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
