sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize