It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Randomize
