I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
