My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
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