you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Randomize
