We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
