i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Randomize
