Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
