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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.

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• (512): View more from Texas

  Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.

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• (727): View more from Florida

  just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.

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• (318): View more from Louisiana

  You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.

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• (316): View more from Kansas

  There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (906): View more from Michigan

  Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.

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• (210): View more from Texas

  I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.

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• (707): View more from California

  I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude

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• (406): View more from Montana

  You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.

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• (276): View more from Virginia

  I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.

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• (206): View more from Washington

  you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site

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