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• (503): View more from Oregon

  why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?

  (541): View more from Oregon

  I don't know but we should still do that

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• (509): View more from Washington

  Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  we just fucked in the mcds parking lot

  (1-732): View more from New Jersey

  wasnt he a virgin

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  yes we got celebratory milkshakes after

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• (281): View more from Texas

  my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.

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  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began

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• (432): View more from Texas

  Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"

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• (770): View more from Georgia

  We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate

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  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots

  (1-410): View more from Maryland

  Cant promise that last part. I won't die though

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• (727): View more from Florida

  I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.

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• (607): View more from New York

  His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.

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• (765): View more from Indiana

  I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.

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