Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
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