i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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