maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
