sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
