No awkward lesbian experiences without me
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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