Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
