I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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