Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
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