Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
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at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
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I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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