Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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