where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
