were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize
