Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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