It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
