He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
