I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Randomize
