i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
