dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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