I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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