we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
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