Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize
