I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Randomize
