JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
My liver just had a heart attack.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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