There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Sext me about skeletons
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
