You can't motorboat a personality
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize