someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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