I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
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