she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
you never un-have a 4some
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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