Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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