I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
