A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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