i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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