i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Randomize
