So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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