We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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